A newborn baby always uses crying to express his emotions and worries. But no mother can listen to her baby's cries for long. Therefore, it is important for every woman to know how to calm her newborn.

It should be remembered that you cannot ignore the crying of a newborn, because this can cause the appearance of an umbilical hernia and weaken the baby’s nervous system.

Main reasons for crying

Hysteria and crying never arise out of nowhere. The following reasons may contribute to this:

• The baby is hungry or thirsty.
• The newborn does not have enough attention, so he attracts it by crying.
• The child may be experiencing discomfort or pain.
• A newborn may often experience fear because he is not yet accustomed to extrauterine life.
• Perhaps the baby is overtired and just wants to sleep.
• When the baby is too cold or hot.

How to determine the cause of crying

If the cause is eliminated, the child will calm down. But how can you determine what exactly is bothering your baby?

How to calm a baby if the reason for crying is colic?

If the reason for crying is colic, then the following actions will help eliminate hysteria:

Crying while feeding

Child, drinking mother's milk, may abruptly refuse the breast and start crying. What are the reasons for such crying and how to eliminate them?

Crying in a dream

The baby may start crying and hysterics not only while he is awake, but also when he is sleeping. What are the reasons for his concern?

Universal ways to calm a newborn

To calm the child, you must first find out the cause and eliminate it. But if the reason for the hysteria is still unclear, then there are several universal ways How to calm a child during a tantrum.

How to calm down with massage

If all of the above methods didn’t help, then mother’s kind and gentle hands can help. How to calm a child during a tantrum with a soothing massage?

During the massage, sing a song or tell your newborn how much you love him. Such actions will distract the baby from hysteria and help quickly eliminate it.

All of the above methods will help eliminate the cause crying and calm the baby.

It is common for a newborn child to cry, be capricious and hysterical in the first days and months of life. The baby expresses his concern to his parents in this way. Even experienced parents who already have two or more children often do not understand why the child is crying and do not know how to calm him down. What to do in such a situation? How to calm a child? Let's figure it out together.

Adults express emotions with words and facial expressions, but a newborn has to shout or cry about any changes in his condition: after all, he does not yet know how to talk. Anyone who is constantly near the baby (usually a mother or a nanny) must learn to distinguish by the nature of the “sound signals” emitted by the child, what exactly is bothering him at this moment and how to help him cope with the problem. How and what the reason “sounds” can be recognized if you show a little attention and sensitivity to the baby.

What to do first?

As soon as the baby begins to whine, the mother should know what to do:

1. Calm down. This is not difficult for experienced mothers of many children, but if a woman has a first-born child, she must learn to quickly pull herself together without giving in to emotions. This is easier said than done: after all, some children can cry constantly, which is very exhausting for both the child himself and the adults around him. If you have a husband or other family member next to you at the moment, hand the baby over to them for a couple of minutes (this will be just enough time for you to calm down), leave the room and breathe deeply. Now your task is to help the newborn return to its former comfortable state.
2. Define. Anything can cause your baby's dissatisfaction: from a desire to eat to pain in the tummy. It is necessary to exclude the causes of crying step by step, one after another, until you find what was bothering the child.
3. Eliminate the cause of concern. The ability to recognize the desires and state of the baby by his crying and behavior leads to the fact that the mother learns to quickly calm down her baby and cope with the problem of his discomfort.

The main thing is to always respond to any manifestation of anxiety on the part of the baby: he never cries for no reason. A cry helps the baby signal to his mother about any discomfort: hunger, heat, wet diapers, pain, etc. And you, as the person closest to him, are simply obliged to understand your child, no matter how difficult it may seem at first.

Causes of anxiety in infants

The most common irritating factors for a newborn baby are:

• hunger,
• accumulated air () in the stomach,
• wet diapers or a leaking overflowing diaper,
• cold (hypothermia) or heat (overheating),
• folds in clothes or diapers,
• overexcitement or fatigue,
• fear of something or someone,
• pain due to a vaccine or illness.

So there are more than enough reasons for the baby to show concern.

Doctor Komarovsky talks about the reasons for children's crying

How to calm your baby

By sifting out one by one the causes of the baby’s discomfort, you can find exactly what worries him and prevents him from being calm and happy at the moment. And a knowledgeable mother will definitely be able to solve the problem.

1. If the child is hungry

In Soviet times, our mothers and grandmothers breastfed their children for hours at a time. Modern pediatricians and psychologists strongly recommend that mothers feed their newborns. Often, a baby's whining indicates hunger. You just need to give him breastfeeding (and in the case of artificial feeding, a bottle of formula). All infants constantly require maternal warmth and attention, so the nipple for them is not only nutrition, but also a unique way of realizing that the closest and dearest person is nearby. Even if the hunger is not so strong.

2. If after feeding the newborn swallows air with milk

After feeding, it is best to hold the baby’s chin with your whole body for some time on the mother’s shoulder and lightly tap him on the back. If it is not done on time and the air remains inside, it can disturb the baby, causing discomfort. As soon as the air (gases) is released, the baby’s anxiety will go away.

3. If the baby is uncomfortable due to the feeling of dampness

Even the highest quality and most expensive diaper is needed, and in the event of defecation, immediately after it. With diapers you will have to do this many times more often. Therefore, as soon as you hear the baby grunting, it is worth checking to see if he is wet, has pooped, or if the diaper is full.

4. If the temperature is uncomfortable. The child is stuffy or cold

When a newborn is stuffy or cold, he certainly reacts to this by crying dissatisfiedly. Overheating and hypothermia are very harmful for the baby due to the immature heat exchange system. In the first month, from a physiological point of view, the baby is not able to retain heat at all. Therefore, pay attention in time to see if he is wearing a lot of clothes in a stuffy room or if he is cold in your room if the room is cool. Be sure to avoid synthetics in children's clothes. Don’t forget to ventilate your child’s room often, but avoid drafts.

5. Buttons on clothes or folds in diapers can cause discomfort for your baby.

All baby diapers and clothes should be soft, made from natural materials, without pilling or folds. Babies under 1 month of age should not have any fittings (buttons, hooks or zippers) in their underwear (babies, undershirts, rompers). For such children, even the seams on things are made outward. If, nevertheless, it is the clothes or a crumpled diaper that caused the child’s discomfort, you just need to change his clothes or swaddle him, and then rock him to calm him down. It helps some children: the baby associates it with tightness in the mother’s tummy.

6. If the baby is overexcited and cannot sleep

Note to moms!

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It often happens that the emotions a newborn receives (in communication with other relatives or guests at home) prevent him from falling asleep peacefully. Such overexcitation will also lead to whims. Simple steps before bedtime can help you set yourself up for a restful sleep:

• evening walk in the fresh air,
• bathing,
• light massage,
• motion sickness in a crib or stroller,
• breast or pacifier
• a slow and quiet pleasant melody, a lullaby or even a monotonous sound,
• a mobile above the crib or stroller with cute little animals and calm music,
• hissing, rocking... etc... there are a lot of ways to calm an infant before bed.

The same methods can be used when a baby is overtired if he has not slept much during the day. All repeated children's whims at night are effectively eliminated thanks to.

7. If the baby gets scared when left alone in the room

When the mother, having put the baby to bed, leaves the nursery, the child may wake up. And as soon as he does not find his loved one nearby, he begins to show concern. To prevent the whimpering from turning into a scream, you need to return to the baby’s room as quickly as possible and rock him. If this does not help, take the baby in your arms.

And a couple more useful tips. Children from birth to 3 months calm down faster from techniques that remind them of intrauterine life: sucking, rocking, hissing, laying on their side in the fetal position and swaddling. And starting from three months, babies are already able to switch attention from one object to another and look at it for a long time. Colored paper, balloons, rattles, bright pictures in a book will help him get distracted, and soon he will forget why he started this whole concert.

An experienced pediatrician at the Healthy Generation clinic, candidate of medical sciences, Natalya Konstantinovna Bishevskaya, will share a unique calming technique. Use these few seemingly simple steps and you can create comfortable conditions similar to those in the womb, in which your baby will quickly stop crying and fall asleep, almost like magic!

How to calm a colicky newborn baby

Intense, heart-rending crying with the characteristic tucking of a child's legs and a hard, swollen tummy most often indicates colic. They are usually observed daily in the evenings and become a real tragedy for mothers who are powerless in the face of the baby’s prolonged cry. There are several proven ways to reduce abdominal pain in a child due to the immaturity of his gastrointestinal tract:

• Place the baby on his back and massage the tummy with closed fingers. It is important to control the pressure, massage carefully, strictly clockwise, avoiding the liver and navel areas.
• Apply heat to your newborn's tummy. A clean diaper or blanket warmed on a radiator (or with an iron) will do.
• Place the baby in the bed, exposing your belly and his, and walk around the room, quietly humming a lullaby. Hissing in the ear also helps: this sound reminds children of the blood flow and breathing of the mother when the child was still developing in her womb.
• Conservative methods are not always able to cope with colic. And when all the remedies have been tried, and the baby is still suffering from excessive gas formation, it is worth turning to an experienced pediatrician for help: he will prescribe suitable safe medications. For example, Riabal and Espumisan in the form of syrup or fennel-based tea.

Mothers feeding breast milk must: the baby may react to certain foods (for example, peas, cabbage or peaches) - and then they will have to be temporarily excluded. It happens that one or another mixture is not suitable for artificial people, and then it also needs to be replaced.

How to soothe a baby when sick

If none of the attempts to calm the baby are successful, you need to pay attention to the presence of additional signs that will indicate the onset of the disease:

• increase in body temperature,
• inflammation and redness of the mucous membranes of the nose, throat and eyes,
• rash on the face or body.

1. Teething: During teething, pain in the gums can be reduced by giving the baby chilled or special children's medications for toothache and itching (for example, Kalgel or Dentinox-N). They are produced in the form of gels, which are applied in small quantities to the child’s inflamed gums.

2. Otitis: Hysterical continuous crying can be a consequence of otitis media if the remains of breast milk or formula get into the ear canals and cause inflammation in the ear. The pain with this diagnosis is so severe that babies even refuse to breastfeed, because... Sucking is also painful for them. You can check if everything is okay with the ear by pressing your finger on the cartilaginous protuberance at the base of the ear. If the baby jerks his head back and screams, immediate consultation with a pediatrician or pediatric otolaryngologist is necessary. Before seeing a doctor, Nurofen syrup relieves pain (you need to take it according to the dosage indicated in the instructions).

3. Vaccination: After vaccination, the injection site may also become sore, hot, or swollen. In such cases, doctors recommend that mothers give their child Nurofen and an antihistamine (for example, Fenistil) on the day of vaccination and the day after it.

Remember! You cannot get carried away with drugs for no apparent reason: they are prescribed exclusively by a doctor in certain doses according to the baby’s illness, condition and age.

It happens that the despair of mothers due to daily children's hysterics or screams turns into real depression and self-criticism. There is no need to look for the reason in yourself, just calm down (after all, your nerves and anxiety are transmitted to the baby) and understand: sooner or later you will definitely learn to quickly understand your beloved baby.

Video: How to calm a crying baby in 5 seconds!

An American doctor figured out how to calm a crying baby in 5 seconds:

Video 2: With translation

Whims, crying, hysterics, screaming - this happens to every child from time to time. Only for some this condition becomes a habit and becomes a constant nightmare for parents, while for others all this happens extremely rarely. In such situations, loving and caring parents are ready to give everything so that it all ends as quickly as possible.

A few useful tips on how to calm a child will help parents navigate the problem and quickly restore peace and tranquility in the home, in the baby’s soul and in their heart. The measures taken will largely depend on the cause of the concern.

A child's hysteria is a strong emotional outburst in a child, an attack after negative internal experiences: irritation, anger, despair, aggression. It is accompanied by loud crying and heart-rending screams. The little tyrant can bend backwards (the pose is called a hysterical bridge). At this moment, the baby has poor motor control and may hit the floor or wall with his head, while feeling almost no pain. At such moments, parents are recommended to calm their raging child in the following ways.

1. Ignore him, don't pay any attention to him. Hysteria is designed for the presence of spectators who will persuade, pity or even scold - at such moments it is very important for a child to become the center of attention. As soon as he realizes that his “number” is not working, the meaning of the hysteria will disappear by itself.
2. Distract him with something completely unrelated, while feigning surprise or fear. Show him something unusual, bright, tell him about something exciting and curious.
3. If tantrums happen regularly, try to understand what is causing them: toys, food, your behavior. By eliminating the factor that provokes hysterics from your child’s life (don’t take him to a toy store, for example), you will stop these “concerts.”
4. Smile and hug your child, whispering a few sweet words in his ear.
5. Take him away from the place where the hysteria happened. The farther from the cause of such a condition, the more it will weaken.

Each child is very individual, and only parents can find a specific approach to him that allows him to cope with a hysterical state. But one golden rule should always work: do not raise your voice at him in such a situation - this will only intensify the hysteria.

Colic

Infantile colic is a behavioral syndrome in babies aged from 2 weeks to 4 months. Characterized by bouts of prolonged, intense crying. They appear most often in the evening for no apparent reason. The child begins to cry a lot, tightens his legs, his tummy tenses and becomes swollen. At such moments, there is no need to grab a first aid kit or call a doctor. A child with colic can be easily calmed on his own.

1. Take him in your arms and start rocking him, lulling him to sleep.
2. Sing him a lullaby.
3. Walk around with him in a sling.
4. Wrap your baby in a soft, warm blanket.
5. Give him a light massage of his back, hips, and tummy.
6. If he likes to bathe, put him in a bathtub filled with warm water.
7. Place the baby face down in your arms and walk like this.
8. Distract and calm your baby with some rhythmic, methodical sound: turn on quiet music, a vacuum cleaner, a dishwasher or washing machine.

If colic becomes a frequent occurrence, be sure to tell your baby’s pediatrician about it. He will make a diagnosis and give recommendations. Shaking, rocking vigorously, or nervously shouting at the baby is useless: this will only increase his anxiety and crying.

Before bedtime

Many children of all ages begin to be capricious before bed, which upsets and often irritates parents. The nightly “concerts” exhaust everyone in the house, and the next morning everyone wakes up with a headache and a wild desire to sleep more. Very simple measures will help calm your child before bed.

How to calm babies under one year old:

1. Change your diaper.
2. Give your tummy a massage.
3. Humidify the room.
4. Ventilate the room.
5. Talk to your baby in a calm voice.
6. Try not to show him your irritation.
7. The gap between daytime and night sleep should be at least 4 hours.
8. Give your baby a warm bath.

How to calm an older child:

1. Sit with him for 10 minutes, tell him a story.
2. Allow him to take a toy to bed.
3. Talk to him in a calm tone, find out the cause of anxiety and fears.
4. Give soothing baby tea.
5. Promise something if he tries to fall asleep faster: a weekend walk, a trip to grandma's, a favorite dish, etc.

In the evening, after work and a hard day, everyone at home is exhausted and wants one thing - silence. The whims of a child of any age at this time are met with hostility, embittered and irritated. Parents must understand that screaming, anger, and punishment will not solve the problem, but will only worsen the situation.

Teeth cutting

Teething is another challenge for any parents. When sharp teeth cut through the soft and delicate tissue of the gums, the child experiences pain, because of this he begins to cry, scream heart-rendingly and continuously, and refuses to eat and sleep. The task of calming the baby in such a situation becomes the goal of everyone at home. It turns out it's not that difficult.

1. Wrap your finger in clean gauze (bandage), without pressing, lightly, very gently scratch the swollen gum with it.
2. Chill the gel teething ring in the refrigerator and give it to your baby.
3. A chilled slice of cucumber, carrot, apple, or rye bread cracker will also help relieve tension from inflamed gums.
4. For temperatures above 38°C, give your baby an antipyretic baby remedy.
5. Special preparations (“Kalgel”, “Dentinox-N”) will have an anesthetic, calming effect, relieving pain and eliminating itching.

Be sure to report your child’s concerns to the doctor, who will give appropriate recommendations, examine the oral cavity, and check if everything is in order.

Hyperactivity

Hyperactivity of a child is a condition in which his activity and excitability exceed the age norm. At the same time, he may not cry or be hysterical, but he will not sit in one place, will not listen to the requests and orders of his parents, will spin around like a loach, chatter about his own things, grab everything in sight, refuse food and sleep. Calming a hyperactive child is very difficult, but it is possible.

1. Read and teach poetry with him: such children often have a phenomenal memory.
2. He can be captivated by changing, mobile, moving toys: a radio-controlled car, nesting dolls, a clock with hands, etc.
3. Do some crafts with him: cut, shear, sculpt, design. Find him something he likes.

If you know the reason why a child behaves tensely and nervously, cries and throws tantrums, you can quickly calm him down, guided by the above recommendations. There is no need to think that such a condition will go away on its own and can be safely ignored. This way you can greatly harm the physical and mental health of your own baby, which will subsequently affect his development and his relationship with you. Parents should not ignore a single child's cry.

And don’t forget that crying is always replaced by a smile!

Very often, tantrums for young children become a way of expressing dissatisfaction. In a situation where babies cry and squirm, young parents are lost and don’t know what to do. In reality, there are many options to stop the storm that has begun. In this article we will tell you how to calm a small child during a tantrum, and how to do it as quickly as possible.

How to calm a newborn baby during a tantrum?

Hysteria for babies who have just recently been born is a very common phenomenon and not at all rare. Their prolonged crying sometimes unsettles the whole family and causes a lot of anxiety for the young mother. Meanwhile, there are many ways to calm an infant during a tantrum, for example:

1. It is enough to swaddle the baby tightly so that he cannot squirm. At the same time, the baby’s arms and legs should have a certain freedom.

   How to calm a child during a tantrum

   This state of affairs allows the screaming baby to feel as if he is back in the womb, which will make him much calmer.

2. If the baby's hysteria is caused by pain and discomfort in the abdomen, he should be placed on his tummy so as to increase the pressure on it. In particular, it is best to place the baby's head on the forearm.
3. The vast majority of newborn babies calm down after being given a pacifier or any other object that can be sucked on. Of course, the mother's breast in such a situation is the most optimal solution.
4. Before they are born, babies are constantly in motion in the womb. It is for this reason that a method such as rocking in a cradle, stroller or rocking chair can calm an infant during a hysteria. In addition, some parents are forced to rock their child in their arms for hours or drive them around the neighborhood in a car.
5. Calm, measured stroking of the naked body can also calm a newborn baby. Remember that tactile contact is very important for babies.

How to calm a hysteria in a 2-3 year old child?

The next stage of disobedience overtakes almost all parents when their baby reaches 2-3 years. At this age, the child sometimes becomes simply uncontrollable, as a result of which mom and dad often break into screams.

Of course, this is absolutely forbidden to do this, while there are other ways to calm a child’s hysterics at 2-3 years old, namely:

1. You can try to distract a child at this age. Some children will go with greater interest to see if leaves have appeared on their favorite birch tree than to continue crying for no apparent reason.
2. To release negative energy, you can offer the baby any other object - a pillow, a toy hammer or a ball.
3. Some children are helped by “pills” for a bad mood, which can be used as candy, gummies, or goats. The main thing is not to use this method too often. Fruit marshmallows, dried fruits - raisins, dried apricots, or fruit chips are best suited as safe sweets.
4. Finally, very often, in order to calm a child, it is enough to hug and kiss him.

15 ways to escape home routine

The routine of household chores is a scary thing. Cooking, washing the dishes, keeping the kids occupied, cleaning and shopping - after a year or two, such a life can make you howl like a wolf.

Many from this vicious circle see only one way out - to urgently go to work: anyone, as long as it’s far away from home. However, urgently giving the work book to an unknown uncle is not always the best solution - you can easily turn into an uninteresting, hysterical woman even in the work collective.

The main problem of experienced housewives is dissolution in the interests of the household. Hence dissatisfaction, lack of impressions and lack of self-realization. In addition, a person is not a squirrel, and “running on a wheel” does not bring him any health or mental benefits. Therefore, when there are 24 hours of homework in a day minus time for sleep, life becomes not a joy. In addition, immersed in everyday life it is difficult to prove your importance.

To put an end to Groundhog Day and finally enjoy life, you don’t have to burn bridges behind you and do rash things.

The right to hysterics, or How to calm a crying child

Sometimes it is enough to slightly adjust your lifestyle.

What can be done?

1. Do not sit around the clock with children. It’s quite difficult to prove to a man that when his mother doesn’t work, she also needs a nanny, but it’s possible. One of my friends simply explained to her husband that she was unable to remain a beautiful and interesting woman with two kids who require constant attention without personal time. Either the power of persuasion worked, or the man loved his wife very much, but he agreed. Even with a fairly average family income, you can find a budget for a nanny who will take care of the children at least one day a week.

2. Plan at least one activity outside the home for every day. Native walls, if you don’t leave them, are a great help in not taking care of yourself, contribute to a lack of impressions and practically guarantee an unhealthy complexion and lethargy. Everyone chooses what to do outside the home according to their taste. For some it’s restaurants, for others it’s cinema, exhibitions, interest clubs or get-togethers with friends. Even daily walks with the dog can brighten up your life – at least it’s good for your health.

3. Do household chores on a schedule . An organizer is needed not only by a manager delayed by calls. If you set aside one day for cleaning, washing and ironing, it will disappear completely from your life, but another six will remain more or less free. It is also not necessary to cook before every meal, and if you allocate a clearly allotted time for culinary exercises, plus or minus 15 minutes, then even daily cooking will not become a burden.

4. Accustom your family to the fact that you have “your own” hours, during which you seem to be there, but in reality you are not. It doesn’t matter: you are watching a TV series at this time, talking on the phone with a friend, meditating or walking on your hands... This time is as sacred as a husband’s fishing, football or gatherings with beer on weekends.

5. Pay attention to your health and appearance. It is most difficult to get to the pool or gym, dentist or hairdresser in the evenings. Therefore, it is better to find time for yourself during the day. And by purchasing a daily membership to the fitness center, you can not only improve your figure, but also save money. There are plenty of choices: swimming, doing aerobics or going to the skating rink (this is convenient to do with children). If such an unobtrusive sport becomes a system, then rest for the soul and good physical shape will be ensured for many years.

6. Educate yourself. Investing time and effort in yourself is beneficial: the bank can burst, jewelry can be stolen, and you are your greatest asset, which needs to be cut and framed. A housewife can easily complete graduate school or get a second higher education, take up dancing, learn several languages, and there is no need to talk about all sorts of courses and “schools of something or other” - there are a huge number of them in every city, if only there were a desire. While studying, your circle of contacts and interests expands, and new knowledge and skills have never bothered anyone.

7. Carry out a cultural revolution. Unlike her friends, who need to take care of the house after work, a housewife has time to keep up with new book releases, go to exhibitions, presentations, watch movies, reread and rethink classics. Constant cultural growth will help you become an interesting interlocutor, and other people's experience can be the key to internal harmony.

8. Cherish my “I want”. The banal “Honey, buy a fur coat!” has nothing to do with this. It’s worth looking for things you enjoy doing and trying things you didn’t have time for before. You can even remember unfulfilled childhood desires, although it doesn’t hurt to have a material dream. Especially if you implement it yourself, making a surprise for others.

9. The most banal, but also the most relevant option is to acquire a hobby. . Over time, it can become a small business that does not require large initial investments. For example, cacti can be bred by placing them on a windowsill, or you can sell rare specimens.

10. Find piecework home work. On the one hand, there is no need to strain yourself, but on the other hand, you have your own business and a small income. Craftswomen often collaborate with accessory stores (creativity and business rolled into one), and one housewife, a mother of two children who was reputed to be an expert in educational toys, opened an online store of children's toys with the help of her web programmer father.

11. Engage in public activities. This greatly amuses social pride and allows you to earn authority in a variety of areas. Do you spend hours on the forum? You can become its moderator. Do you read LJ? Create and promote some thematic community. However, you shouldn’t limit yourself to virtual life.

12. Discover volunteering. If awareness of your own need and the desire to do something good for others is more important to you than money, welcome. You can study music, dance or home economics with orphans, take care of your favorite animals at the zoo, raise money for a stroller for a disabled person, or organize a campaign to equip a playground. Good deeds make both us and the surrounding reality better.

13. Select the most distant area in which you have no foot in the world, and rush to study it. The feeling of “surprisingly, I can do this” raises self-esteem to the skies. At the same time, there will be one less blank spot on the map of knowledge and skills.

14. Draw a picture of an ideal life and try to bring at least a piece of it to life. The worst case scenario in any situation that does not suit us is complete inaction. If something is wrong, first of all, you need to stop cherishing the feeling of hopelessness and think about how to improve your life with your own hands.

15. If the previous methods did not produce results, the advantages in the lifestyle of a housewife have not been found, in the end, you can simply To find a job .

What not to do

“Experienced” friends who recommend entertainment for the sake of having a lover or having a child should be treated with healthy skepticism. If you are bored, sad, tired of the routine and life is not nice before the birth of the child, there is no guarantee that changes for the better will come after. Yes, and affairs on the side very rarely lead to harmony in family life; more often it happens the other way around.

Olesya Sosnitskaya

How to calm a child?

Before you start reading tips on how to calm a child, answer yourself the question: do you need to calm him down? Crying is a semblance of speech, because a child cannot speak. Thanks to these sounds, which test the nervous system of parents and sometimes neighbors, the baby develops his lungs, increases their volume, and enriches the blood with oxygen. Crying for five to ten minutes for no reason is completely normal. In addition, the parents don’t see the reason, but the baby has it: the mother is too far away, wants to be held, is hungry, it’s time to change the diaper, etc. But there are situations when the child literally screams so selflessly that the mother is ready to go to any concessions, just to enjoy the silence. It’s not difficult to calm a baby: mother’s hands and breasts work wonders. But with older children it is a little more difficult, but there is still a solution to the problem.

Distract, talk, motivate

Most often, parents are puzzled by how to calm their child before bed, because most of the tantrums occur at this time. If the baby is no more than 5-6 years old, then you can, with a serious look, inform him about some important task that, due to crying, he will not have time to do. For example, remind him that he was going to listen to a fairy tale. “Let’s cry a little later, and now I’ll read it to you.” Usually children give in, and then forget to “cry more.” Another way is to ask the child to cry a little quieter so that dad doesn’t wake up or scare the dog. When the baby listens, real crying will disappear, and the “vocal exercises” will disappear. Babies can be disarmed by asking them to cry faster in order to finish early. In general, your imagination will tell you how to calm a crying child during a hysteria. The main thing is not to get excited and not to follow the lead of the little tyrant.

Ignoring sometimes also turns out to be an effective method, but in this case one must have firm confidence that a whim is really a whim, and not a request for participation and care.

You can often hear parents asking their child to “give change” to the tree whose branch he caught on, or the floor on which he fell. The method undoubtedly works - the baby is distracted by hitting wood or the floor, but they are not the only ones who can “offend.”

How to calm a child if he is hysterical?!

Such an attitude may become entrenched in the child’s mind, from which other children will suffer in the future.

“Not in one word..”

When words and persuasion do not work, you can try soothing herbal tea for children. Chamomile and linden give good results, but herbs can be given to a child from four months. Soothing baths for children (optionally with pine extract) help calm the nervous system of a hyperactive child. If there are no allergies, then you can add soothing essential oils to the bath, which are suitable for children aged six months and older. Promotes relaxation and relief tension lavender, bergamot, chamomile and fennel oils.

If stressful situations are protracted and regular, the pediatrician can prescribe sedatives for children that will help correct the functioning of the nervous system. You shouldn’t listen to your friends’ advice about what sedatives children can take and in what dosage. A child’s immature and overstrained nervous system is a complex mechanism, so only a doctor should prescribe medications. Dormikid is often recommended for newborns, and notta for children over one year old. Pharmacies also have sedatives for children, which can be given from two to three months.

Remember, your reaction to crying must be adequate: the child will react to your crying in the future the way you calmed him down today.

A child's tantrums can sometimes take on a very frightening form: the child can bang his head on the floor, wall or objects, scratch his face, bite his hands until they bleed, etc. He can turn into a real despot - hate his younger brother or sister, show extreme negativism in literally everything - break his favorite toys, and angrily reject the affection of those closest to him. Is this normal or pathological?

How to calm a child during a tantrum

In what cases should you consult a doctor? How to calm your baby? What measures should be taken to get rid of children's tantrums? Some simple and effective tips.

Age crisis 2-3 years

The crisis of 2-3 years is associated with the emergence of what we call the human personality. The child begins to vaguely sense his “I” and rebels, defining and setting its limits.

The crisis of this age is characterized by such striking features as extreme negativism, obstinacy, capriciousness and stubbornness.

It should be noted that many children are safely spared from all the vicissitudes of the first “growing up”. The following unfavorable factors can serve as an impetus for the development of a crisis:

· birth of a second child;

· past illness or injury (not necessarily severe);

· troubles in the family (including minor ones);

· errors in education;

· moving to a new place of residence.

However, as medical practice shows, in many cases it is impossible to establish the cause of the crisis and all that remains is to explain it as a hereditary factor (which is very convenient, since not all parents know their own genealogy up to the seventh generation).

Basic measures to prevent tantrums in children

Many experts consider the main reason for the crisis of 2-3 years to be the unusually rapid psychological development of the child. At this age, the baby literally absorbs new impressions, every minute enriching himself with new knowledge about the world and himself.

That is why the child needs a clear daily routine. In order to fully rest, the baby must sleep at approximately the same time for a total of at least 12-13 hours a day (10-11 hours at night and 1.5-2.5 hours during the day).

Limit the number of too vivid impressions, especially before bed. At the same time, try to communicate with your child as much as possible. Instead of watching TV, tell him a fairy tale (tell him, not read him - this is important). Instead of going to the circus, take your child to the park.

It is necessary, if possible, to avoid situations that provoke hysteria (joint trips to the store), etc.

Show maximum diplomacy. For example, a child doesn’t want to put away his toys – turn it all into a game. Do not hesitate to be “on an equal footing” with your baby as often as possible - believe me, you will in no way lower your authority in his eyes by playing with him.

If a child shows burning jealousy towards a younger brother or sister, do not panic. Just be patient, a year or two will pass and your children will be inseparable.

And now the elder needs to explain all the delights of his position, which he does not notice. A great reason to praise the baby: “You’re the eldest, you already know how to do this, well done!” At the same time, it’s a good idea to ask the child for a small favor (bring something, etc.) and praise again.

Smile more often and remember that the crisis of 2-3 years, like any crisis in our lives, is just a temporary phenomenon, an extremely difficult, but transitional stage.

The baby is hysterical. Emergency parental assistance

Of course, it is almost impossible to completely eliminate factors that provoke hysterics. This is especially true for walks, accompaniment to nurseries and kindergartens. However, you should pay attention to the fact that very often children are very selective about the public, throwing tantrums exclusively to one of the parents. In such cases, try to adopt positive experiences and figure out what you are doing wrong.

Basic rules of behavior during hysterics:

1. At the first sign, try to distract the child’s attention. The psyche of children at this age is very labile, so sometimes it is enough to show the child some interesting thing for him to “switch.”

2.Keep calm. The hysteria is intended for the public; if the public does not react, the hysteria will stop. The main audience for a child's hysteria is you, no matter how many people are on the street - they are an audience for you, but not for the baby.

3.No matter how difficult it is, do not make concessions under any circumstances. A child prefers to throw tantrums in the presence of strangers only because he knows from experience that in this case you will definitely compromise.

4. Ignore the hysteria, but not the baby - do not drive him to despair with indifference. Talk to him in a calm voice and smile. Don't pay attention to passers-by - they will leave, just like the crisis.

In what cases should you consult a doctor?

Tantrums in children can be the first symptoms of many serious diseases, such as MMD (minimal brain dysfunction), autism, etc.

So if you are doing everything correctly (establishing a daily routine, not overloading the baby with new impressions, all family members support a unified approach to raising a child, etc.), but there are no positive changes, then it is best to seek help from a psychologist or neuropsychiatrist .

You should be especially careful in the following cases:

· there were factors predisposing to damage to the central nervous system (pregnancy occurring with pathology, prematurity, difficult childbirth, etc.);

· there is a delay in physical, mental, speech or social development;

· the baby has little interest in the environment, can play stereotypical games for hours (repeating the same movements) and reacts violently to any outside interference in the game.

age crisis of 2-3 years, tantrums in children, development of children 2-3 years old

Children aged 2 to 5-6 years use crying as a way of communication and signals to parents about pain, illness or dissatisfaction.

Crying is not only a distress signal, it is a way of manipulating parents and expressing one’s own opinion, demonstrating character and expressing emotions.

However, sometimes bouts of crying put parents into a stupor: it is sometimes very difficult to calm the child down. What should parents do, how to cope with the situation?

Let's look at several situations and ways to calm a child, reminding once again that we are not talking about babies, but about children aged 2-6 years.

If the child is sick

Naturally, crying can be a signal of illness - teeth, ears, head or tummy hurt, but the child then confidently points you to the source of the pain.

In this case, it is necessary to call a doctor, measure the temperature, at least lightly examine the baby and identify the source of pain. It is necessary to help the baby with all possible forces - give an antipyretic, call the doctor and ask how to alleviate the condition, caress and hug the baby, calm him down.

Typically, painful signs manifest themselves as a whole complex of symptoms - behavior changes, fever or nausea, diarrhea, vomiting.

A child is having a tantrum: how to calm it down?

But if there are no external signs, you should not ignore your baby’s complaints and think that he is faking it. Usually children know how unpleasant illnesses are and rarely lie. Always be attentive to your child’s health complaints.

If a child falls and hits himself or is injured

A child may cry from pain, resentment or fear, and it is necessary to be able to properly help and calm him down. There are special psychological techniques that teach a child to cope with emotions and quickly calm down when crying. These techniques are somewhat different from the usual methods of calming us, but they help much more effectively than conventional techniques.

What not to do

First of all, you should not talk to your child while he is crying, much less scold him or scold him. There is no need to tell him “go, I’ll feel sorry for you,” ooh and ahh, or lament “poor, little, honey, bunny,” etc.

Silently open your arms and accept the baby into your arms, holding him tightly to you and wrapping him around you like a warm blanket. Firstly, it will give the child a feeling of security and your reliability. Secondly, it will allow you to cope with your anxiety and emotions, trembling in your hands from fear.

You should not convey your excitement to your child at the level of the body and subconscious, you must convey to him calmness and strength. These hugs allow the child’s brain to comprehend the problem and not overload it with information.

You should not blow on the wounds, and immediately try to help him - unless, of course, it is serious bleeding or a fracture. In case of a banal bump or abrasion, it is more important to help the child psychologically.

It is a mistake to shove toys or candy at him or rock him to sleep like a baby: do not give the child a reason to manipulate the situation and go into hysterics! All your actions will again overload the baby’s psyche, while he needs to calm down.

The next time a child falls, and you don’t run to him in fear, start lisping and scold him, he may not cry at all, but will cope with his fall on his own. He will get up, shake himself off and come to you calm.

What should be done

First of all, hug the child, holding him tightly to you and isolating him from the scene of the fall or accident. Let him feel you with his whole body.

Start breathing evenly and deeply, counting to ten at a slow pace. You will notice how intermittent the child’s breathing is and how it smoothly levels out and recovers. In children, this happens unconsciously and reflexively - to align their breathing with the breathing of an adult.

You can accompany your breathing with light rocking, stroking, patting - in a word, tactile stimulation of the skin. But this should be light and unobtrusive so as not to distract the child from understanding the situation. You shouldn’t try to stop crying right away - you need to give vent to your emotions with tears. You can hum lightly or hum songs without words, this also helps calm and restore breathing.

And only after the baby begins to breathe evenly and stops sobbing, you can analyze the situation without emotions: see where and what happened, tell the story of his fall without emotions and condemnation, assessments - only information. For example, “you were walking, there was a toy on the floor, you tripped over the toy and fell.”

At the climax of the story, the baby may try to get upset again, but this is his right - he needs to experience and comprehend the situation, only then will he learn to cope with crying and calm down faster.

What you shouldn’t do is to judge and judge a situation when telling a situation: “that’s because you threw toys,” “that’s because you were fooling around,” etc.

If your child is having tantrums

Children's tantrums are attacks of screaming with crying and indignation that occur in the event of strong emotional outbursts. This is a way of manipulating loved ones, caused by anger, irritation, aggression or despair. It is this crying that is most difficult for parents to calm down, since injuries and falls are quickly forgotten, and the child is clearly focused on the causes of hysteria.

In these cases, there is no clear advice; in each case it is necessary to find your own way out of the situation. But there are several methods that are popular with educators and parents of large families.

For hysterics in crowded places, shops, playgrounds or at home, the following techniques help:

divert the child’s attention to the sky by showing an “airplane”, clouds or something unusual there; it is advisable to try to involve other adults in this (they usually play along), and this can easily distract the child from the subject of the hysteria. The attention of adults, and even collective attention, greatly arouses curiosity and stops hysterics.

start looking for a phone or car alarm, pretending that they are beeping. Start telling your baby what to answer, turn it off, run to look at the car, etc. If this is a trick with a telephone, pretend to be a conspirator and hurry the child home or wherever you need to go, saying that “they told me on the phone, there’s someone waiting for you...”. Next, be guided by the circumstances.

pretend that you are crying even more bitterly than the baby, and that you are in great pain. Usually kids rush to calm their crying parents, forgetting about their problems.

You can, on the contrary, start making faces, tickling the baby and making faces, doing stupid things, in general, turning the hysteria into laughter. More often than not, this helps dads; they have self-control and a better sense of humor than moms.

And it always helps to talk to the child as an adult, explaining everything as it is, the whole situation. You need to hug and caress the child - most often, hysterics occur from a lack of affection and attention, children use them as a way to attract the interest of mom and dad, to show that they lack something in communication with their parents.

Does your child have tantrums in public places? How are you coping?

Are you tired, confused, and have only one desire - to understand your 3-year-old child? Do not despair! We will tell you how to calm a crying child, prevent his hysteria, and also give doctor's recommendations!

What is the best way to calm a little robber?

Hello girls! Let's talk about our “bad kids”: babies and toddlers, “capricious ones” and “psychics”. You are mothers, and I am a mother, so we will share our experience, maybe something will sprout!

I have three sons of completely different ages. Therefore, the topic of how to properly calm whims, an instant “I want” or even cope with a child’s hysteria is EXTREMELY relevant. Today I will share with you the experience of an experienced mom.

Possible causes of tears in 3-year-old children and ways to eliminate them

My middle son is 3 years old. Situations when he tries to defend his rights, showing his stubbornness, occur every day. Do not panic! At this age, such behavior is considered normal.

A tiny person can show his character in various forms.

For myself, I have learned several immutable rules. I hope they will help you get through this difficult moment in your family’s life as painlessly as possible, and you will be able to understand how to calm a crying child.

1. Learn to switch your baby to other things in time. This will help you calm him down and not lead the situation to conflict.

My “darling” has fixed ideas: watch cartoons, play computer, tablet or Tetris. What to do: modernity dictates its own rules, so I make my own adjustments, trying to limit the time for playing and watching cartoons. And then the most interesting thing begins: we (my child) begin to howl and cry loudly, pitifully calling for another tiny, tiny drop of time to watch a cartoon or play a game.

Nowadays, you can’t live without a tablet...

What to do, because crying can develop into something more? Moms, just calm down! The impending conflict can be stopped:

• Need to wait for the main peak of the scream(the main thing is not to miss the next “entry of psychosis”);
• Preferably remove the object of “heated passions” from sight;
• AND switch attention.

Decide for yourself how to distract your child. You know his interests better. I try to distract mine with one of his favorite activities:

In this way, we forget about cartoons, computer games and other nonsense.

2. If you punished your child, scolded him, put him in a corner, deprived him of a cartoon or sweets - do not give up and do not give in, be “firm” in your decisions.

Imagine, I recently had an incident with my youngest. He is 1 year old (and 3 months old). It became a fashion for him to crawl up to the computer and press the beautiful bright shutdown button.

The situation is still the same: it seems too small to scold, but I did what I did. Please don't throw stones at me. In general, I put him in the corner! Yes, yes, you heard right. She pointed to the computer button, shook her finger with all severity, cursed and put her in a corner. Of course, he cried a lot, I really wanted to feel sorry, but I didn’t show it. 2-3 minutes passed, I took him to the computer, once again pointed to the button and shook my finger. He understood everything! After this incident, he does not press the button! So, The “firmness” of the decision had its “fruits”.

Sometimes it is worth taking drastic measures to resolve some misunderstandings.

But sometimes circumstances force us to back down. For example, this is not the first day you have been locked up at home with two cold children. Naturally, their energy has nowhere to go, they begin to play pranks and mischief more than usual. In this case, categoricalness is not appropriate. Discipline is harder to achieve these days, and maybe not worth it at all. I repeat, any situation requires an individual approach.

If your child is hysterical and can’t sleep, offer him. This natural drink has a beneficial effect on the nervous system and is absolutely safe for the young body.

Recently, more and more infants are suffering from increased muscle tone. If your baby has been diagnosed with this, we recommend reading.

3. But what to do when a child is hysterical: he kicks the floor and screams, he has a desire for power over others, and he wants to achieve what he wants by any means?

With such whims, I (calmly, but strictly) send the child to my room. I tell him that he can go out when he stops crying (If there is no free room, you can sit him on a chair for a few minutes until he calms down). After a short period of time, he comes out as if nothing had happened, and we talk to him completely calmly.

If you live with your grandmothers, then try to explain to them the importance of this moment. You feel much more sorry for your grandchildren than for your children, and grandparents “give up the slack.” Of course, it’s worth listening to the recommendations of the older generation, but, more often than not, their care comes down to basic indulgence of children’s whims.

If the situation is terrible and begins to get out of control, and the child becomes hysterical, then just hug the baby. There is no need to forcibly hold him, your movements are calm and soft. There is no need to say anything, let the child speak out, scream and cry. Your task is to hug the baby, perhaps sit him on your lap, rocking him and stroking his back. This should calm him down.

Mommy's hugs will have a beneficial effect on the baby.

In cases where the child is easily excitable, it is advisable to consult a specialist doctor. My eldest child was hyperactive, and we visited a family psychologist. He really enjoyed this communication, where we learned to play role-playing games. The doctor recommended to us:

• exclude active evening games;
• give valerian tablets or mint tea before bed;
• observe his surroundings: exclude children with whom he conflicts.

You will learn Dr. Komarovsky’s opinion on how to deal with children’s whims at this age by watching the video:

4. To avoid aggression, you need to praise your child more often. And try to explain what you are happy with. This will reinforce positive behavior.

Your job as a mom is to pick up on the little things. Even while busy with your own affairs, try to observe and notice with your peripheral vision. So he ate the candy, and went to throw the piece of paper in the trash. Or he came from the street and carefully placed his sandals next to them to “make friends.” Be sure to pay attention to these points. Sometimes it's better to miss something that's not so good, but You should always pay attention to the good, consolidating this achievement. For example, pat him on the hair or simply take a break from your business by giving him a warm smile. Believe me, he will please you more often with his good behavior.

Encourage any positive endeavors your child makes.

5. Be alert to nightmares.

Very often, hyperactive and impressionable children relive all the events of the day at night. It is advisable to relieve the child’s nervous system before bedtime:

My tomboys really love herbal tea. In the summer, I prepare plants and herbs in advance for these purposes: leaves of wild strawberries, currants, mint, rose hips. We have a tradition: in the evening (before going to bed), having stopped fussing, we brew and drink this tea with a slice of lemon. It calms well and strengthens the immune system.

Observe what kind of music your baby likes and calms. My boys have a wonderful alarm clock with the night sky, which has several beautiful melodies. Every evening, taking turns, one of the boys chooses his own melody. This is how they fall asleep.

• read him a fairy tale, talk about it and smoothly move on to the day's events (no matter whether good or bad). Everything needs to be discussed!

6. Try to talk to your child more often.

Ask why he threw a tantrum and cried so desperately. You can often hear vague answers, such as: “I was bored,” “I just wanted to,” but don’t be too strict. And remember: he is only 3 years old. Teach your fidget to think about his actions. Talk about the wrongdoings committed and how you can behave differently, telling examples from life that are understandable (for the child to understand). These “heart-to-heart conversations” will teach your child to analyze his actions, and, importantly, will bring you very close.

Swimming relaxes and calms, strengthens and improves immunity. Babies especially love to splash in the water. There are many pools where you can go. Swimming gymnastics is a pleasant pastime for mothers and their children.

At home, with a small child, you can do gymnastics on a fitball. Read how to do this correctly.

Recommendations for desperate mommies (and daddies as well)

Books on raising children helped me a lot at the time. In my opinion, every family raising children should have these books. Here are my favorites:

I will be very glad if I could help you a little. Without knowing you and your child, I can say one thing for sure: no book, no psychologist, teacher or doctor will be able to see the changes happening to YOUR child as carefully as YOU - an attentive parent! Just love your baby and changes will not take long to arrive. Of course, they won't happen in one day. Be patient and enjoy even the smallest victories. And your child will definitely surprise you and give you a smile!